Trust

trust / trʌst / [truhst]
–noun
1. reliance on the integrity, strength, ability, surety, etc., of a person or thing; confidence.
2. confident expectation of something; hope.
 
I love this photo, it's called Friendship & Trust.  Someone recently said that, "It takes years to build trust and only seconds to destroy it."  Man oh man, have I let a number of individuals down in my lifetime.  People who should be able to trust me, I fear, have been let down.  
 
This getting older business...being able to recognize your flaws and feeling an intense desire to repair them is exhausting!  
 
Sidney Jourard, author of the Transparent Self, said that there are three ways we are seen.
~ The way others see us.
~ They way we see ourselves.
~ And finally there is the real you.  (Some would say that it's the way God or a higher power sees you.)
These perceptions share things in common, yet there are parts of you that only you can see, there are parts of you that only others can see and there are parts of yourself that are undiscovered.  The goal in life is to become one perception; what you see is what you get.  I feel like I am constantly discovering new things about myself.  However, it's only been recently that I've really taken to heart what others may think of me and how important it is to take that information and grow from it.  
 
One issue I desperately need to work on is being trustworthy.  It's not like I am this awful, dishonest being.  But there are times when I share more than I should, when I don't keep my word and when I don't meet the expectations set on me.  When someone has to say, "You can't tell anyone.  Really Ela!!  You can't say a word."  Or when I am counted on to remember a birthday, but I forget and give a lame excuse as to why.  You realize there is a problem and it needs to be fixed.  No more excuses.  The only thing you can do is change. 
 
I realize that at this point sorry just isn't going to cut it.  I realize that I am going to have to work hard, possibly for years, to regain lost trust.  Boy!!!  Am I thankful for people who love me despite all my flaws.  It's because of them that I don't drive off a cliff.  (Lol, one of my good friends from Jersey once said to a group of us, as she was driving, that she sometimes gets the urge to just swerve the car off the road.  Haha, you should have seen our faces of terror.  LOL, funny.)
 
Anyways, sorry for the rant!
 
*Picture taken by Shiv Photography.

San Diego: Sea World

Our first day in San Deigo we went to Sea World.  Man, what a place.  Honestly we had SO much fun!  Well, other than the greedy monster, which I will explain a little later.  Anyways, what a GREAT place.  :)

We fed the Sea Lions:

(Do you see the bird flying towards Daniel?  It totally got the fish before Daniel was able to feed it to the sea lion.  Wa-wa!)

(These sneaky guys had fish stealing down to a science!)

We saw Sharks:

We went to the Artic, which you got to go through a motion ride (pretend helicopter ride to the Artic).  It made me SICK and was the highlight of Daniel's trip.  :):

(I don't know why, but I would get gossebumps and a tear in my eye everytime I saw a whale or dolphin.  They are so beautiful.)

We got to pet Sting Rays:

We fed the Flamingos:

We played:

We got wet:

We also saw, but didn't get pictures of: dolphins, penguins (so cute!), and Shamu.  I also saw a little greedy monster come out of my son everytime we left an exhibit.  Each exhibit has a gift shop as you walk out and every gift shop that we saw, Daniel began to whine, cry, BEG for a toy.  It about drove me NUTS!!  Honestly, they position the toys right at the kids line of sight and of course, he had to have it.  By the sixth exhibit I had to pull him aside and give him a STERN talking to.  "Sea World is our adventure!  It is our treat, being here is the treat!  You don't need more toys, toys that you'll leave on your floor!"  He didn't ask for about two exhibits and by the time we left the penguins he was in full on tears!  By that time I was tired of fighting with him and I caved!!!!  I'm so weak!!!!  But after he got the toy, he didn't ask again and we were able to enjoy the rest of the adventure.  Lesson learned...hmmm...I'm still trying to figure that one out.

Holga's Summer

I've had some fun with the HOLGA this summer.  I've learned some things too!   Like...

... pictures of moving objects probably aren't a good idea.

...have your camera ready to take the next picture otherwise you end up with a double exposure on one frame. 

...the light leaks (reddish streaks at top of pic) are a beautiful perk to the picture, but the filters aren't my favorite.

...there is a glare on the lens if not positioned just right!  Do you see it along the top?

...I must be better about keeping a steady hand!

I also learned that the pictures that I took for no real reason other than to just take a picture are some of my favorite pics this summer!